


I Eavesdropped

by starshipslytherin



Series: Jegulus writing [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Awkward Crush, Awkward Situation, Brotherly Love, Eavesdropping, Hiding, In case you couldn't tell, Love Confessions, M/M, Marauders' Era, Quidditch locker rooms, Regulus hides in his locker, Regulus thinks James looks good in his underwear and socks, Secret Crush, Teen Crush, because why not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-11-05 21:52:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11022312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starshipslytherin/pseuds/starshipslytherin
Summary: Regulus can't help it, he somehow ends up hiding in his locker while his brother's best friend talks about his crush on him. And he can't escape. Awkward.





	I Eavesdropped

Regulus wouldn't have bothered to stop if he hadn't heard his own name, murmured in an unsure, timid way, slowly pressed over someone's tongue as if they were afraid it would do too much damage when released, but knowing it had to be. He froze; the footsteps coming closer had come to a halt; that scared him more than their approach.  
Everything went quiet. It was as though the two people the footsteps and the voices had belonged to never existed. Regulus cautiously held his breath, hoping he would conjure them back if he was quiet enough.  
And then he heard his name a second time. The way the other voice said it was so different. It spat it out, like a curse, a disease, with a hint of surprise. He pressed his back against the wall until he had molten into it like spilled wax into mother's tablecloth. Was he staining, ruining the wall, too?  
"Yes", whispered the first voice barely audibly. "I'm sorry."  
Even though Regulus didn't know exactly what was going on, the silence was pressing his lungs together, making his eyeballs swell, his throat tighten up. The air was thick with the first speaker's discomfort and vibrating with betrayal.   
"I can't help it", they added, "I tried to. It's as if my heart just slipped away and won't come back because it likes where it's at."  
A huff echoed throughout the dim, abandoned rooms, followed by a second one, which almost sounded like a growl. "Have it your way", snarled the deep voice, the words heavily swirling about.  
"I'm sorry, Pads. I can't help it. Believe me when I say I've tried."  
A deep sigh cut through the tense atmosphere like a knife. One set of quick, heavy footsteps alerted Regulus's body to move; in his confounded trance, gliding across the room into his locker felt like swimming through thick fog.  
He saw the tall, black-haired savage stride in and fall onto the bench, huffing, with a sinister gleam on the fine contours of his face that had tinted his golden irises black. He crossed his arms and surveyed his friend gloomily, an unlit cigarette dancing threateningly between his teeth.  
"He's a baby, Prongs", he hissed.  
James was still leaning against the door frame, somehow he had swept there through the mist. His hand found its way up to his unruly dark curls, messing them up as he scratched his scalp. He bit his lower lip and evaded Sirius's gaze, examining the wooden floor.   
Regulus's insides were sinking. He would have loved to just stop time and march out, but he knew he couldn't. He would not be able to simply unhear anything that had been said, but at least, if he remained quiet, he might pretend later that he hadn't eavesdropped. The lump in his throat was trying to strangle him, and the loud pounding in his chest was suffocating him and nearly giving away his whereabouts.   
"He's quite smart for a baby", said James with a shrug, and his nonchalant tone of voice probably still couldn't quite fool Sirius. Regulus bit his lip; he hadn't believed 'smart' was what people would describe him as. He was wondering whether that would still be the case if he was discovered hiding in a locker, only wearing a towel wrapped around his waist and torso, wet long hair carelessly twisted to something like a bun on top of his head so it wouldn't bother him while he was getting dressed.  
He suppressed a welp when he realised what James was going to do. Half ashamed, half unable to look away, he watched the muscular, tan body being unveiled, gracefully, like an ancient Roman statue that only wore striped socks and blue pants. The mind had detached from the eye; he didn't understand this was James, James Potter; all he knew was he liked what he was seeing, without comprehending what to do with this information, and it felt as though he was levitating in a blur.  
"I really like him, Pads, please listen to me. It's not my fault."  
Of course it was not his fault. The few people who had ever liked Regulus had never done so on purpose, and it had never ended well. If at all. It didn't always have to end. Regulus hugged himself and shivered. He was getting cold; being aware another unlucky person had been lured into the trap that was caring about him, another lost soul, sent a series of shivers down his spine.  
"How long?", Sirius snorted, still chewing on his cigarette. James looked at him for quite a while, then turned his back on him, breathing tensely, as if he was out of breath and trying to compose himself, to keep himself from panting. When he strode across the room towards the lockers, Regulus inhaled sharply and brought his fist up to his mouth to silence his breathing, which was so uncontrollably loud, biting the joint of his index finger.  
He felt James's pounding against the locker walls from three lockers to the left. Finally, James returned to Sirius's side of the room, his scarlet Chaser robes hanging loosely over his shoulder like a bloody towel.  
"I can't know", James mumbled as he was pulling his robes over his head. "The awareness slowly came long after it started. That was last year. When he had this bun and tried to look graceful and ended up looking adorable. I love his hair. I'm sure it's soft. And I - I had been thinking of him in that way for a long time until I realised that's not how you think about someone platonically. That's not how I ever thought of anyone else. He's special. Witty and - and funny in his own way, and he thinks he's so elegant but he's so tiny, and he knows so many little things and he's got the sharpest tongue that I've ever heard talking. And don't tell him I said that, but he's way better than our seeker."  
Regulus tasted blood. He would have stormed right out and confronted this idiot - how dare he say he was tiny and insinuate his attempts to look graceful were ridiculous - but there were so many other things he had said. He couldn't remember that someone ever called him special, or funny, or even adorable; no other Gryffindor would ever say he was a good seeker, and nobody had appreciated his hair that much or liked his pointy sense of humour. Something warm ran down his cheek. He squeezed his eyelids together so all of it could flow away, and he nibbled on his bloody finger to comfort himself.  
Sirius had given him hugs that perhaps said all of this to him, once, and he would love to have it back. He knew James would not be able to give to him what his brother had done for him, the laughs, the hair ruffles. It would be different with James. James wasn't his brother.  
"I hope you're not going to hurt him", said Sirius warily. "He's so soft. He's my little brother, you know. He's only fourteen."  
Regulus opened his eyes and glared at Sirius through the slits in his locker door. 'I'll show you how soft I am, you git', he thought, aggressively staring at the stupid cigarette until he finally put it away.  
James now had his robes on. "I know, mate", he sighed. "And I'm only fifteen. Besides, he hates me. This won't ever work out. No need to worry."  
"So quick to give up, are we?", Sirius teased.  
Regulus mentally agreed.  
"I'm not giving up", James said. "I can't. Too much in love. Now let's go."  
And they left.  
"What are you going to do?", Sirius's voice echoed in the distance.  
"Something", James replied cheerfully.  
Regulus's heart was somehow warming him up again, and he breathed.


End file.
